Forgiven. Not Forgotten.

January 30th, 2010

Am I upset with someone?

Absolutely not. However, something came up in a conversation I was having with a person struggling with someone who had hurt them. This person was trying to figure out the “forgive and forget” thing. The problem with this is, we are people, with memories. It is impossible to completely forget what others have or have not done to us. The good news is, we are told to forgive. No matter how hard the hurt has hit you, forgive.

Let me explain: Continue reading »

Give.

January 30th, 2010

This isn’t about me. This is about you. This is not pointed at anyone specifically, but there are too many people caring only about and for themselves.

Now, the people who live where I do will not be surprised by this, because, after all, it’s normal behavior “‘round these here parts”… Things I do daily: Continue reading »

"It’s not like I’m anyone important…"

January 30th, 2010

ANNOYING.

Sigh. Why do people whine about not getting attention, and then talk about how insignificant they are to society? I am so sick of hearing it. They act as if everyone’s lives are supposed to revolve around them, their opinions, what they have to say and what they think is important…. Then comes the whining that no one cares…. Then the talk about how they are no one important. Continue reading »

Confidence

January 30th, 2010

Before reading this, you need to know that this is an email I sent to a friend. He, at the time, had very little confidence and wasn’t a whole lot of fun to hang around. Since, that has changed. He isn’t outta the water yet, but things are looking up. Anyway, I thought it could apply to all of us. I took out the things that were personalized, but left the rest just as it was. I hope any one of you can take this to heart. Continue reading »

My View On: Celebrity Deaths

January 30th, 2010

There have been several celebrity deaths in recent time, and with each, the world has mourned. BUT… There are SEVERAL people who are “oh so sad” over these deaths, yet I have NEVER once heard them talk about how much they “loved” them… Why do they “love” them now? And why– okay, let’s use Michael Jackson on this one — When he was alive, in recent years we have not heard the media talk about him in a good light. Nor have you. Most have made jokes about him (most people did)… And the second he dies, suddenly he’s flashed all over the TV as  “one of the greatest”–C’mon! You didn’t love him, probably talked bad about him and the scandals… Now he’s great? I love how two-faced this world is. And how quickly they will all go along with whatever the rest of the world thinks and/or is doing. Okay, I’m not going to get off topic with that, because I could go on and on. Continue reading »

Laughter

January 30th, 2010

How much is it REALLY worth? I am no doctor, but I would say it’s worth quite a bit to your health, both physically and mentally. I am a very outgoing, positive girl. I tend to look at the good in every situation, every person. (This isn’t always good, it makes me give too many second chances, sometimes.) But for the most part, it’s a good thing. When things go wrong, I laugh. When I am mad, yes, I laugh. When I am happy, I laugh. When someone says something even “kinda” funny, I laugh. There have been many potentially awkward, painful moments that I have just laughed my head off. I can think of a specific situation with my best friend, that could have been…well, weird. But instead of making a big deal out of something that wouldn’t matter the next day, we laughed. I was rolling around, literally, laughing. Continue reading »

Puzzle Pieces

January 30th, 2010

Relationships. Anyone who knows me well, knows I’ve had my fair share of them. This is not something I am proud of. However, being in, and out, and in, and out…of various relationships, has taught me a heck of a lot about them.

In the last 24 hours, I’ve had 2 people bring up relationships to me. One being my sister, the other being a friend. These were 2 different situations. They were down about their situations, but I told them both the same thing. A friend of mine from high school gave me this piece of advice, and although I haven’t always found it easy to remind myself of it — my friends have often had to remind me what I’ve said to them after a break-up — it’s so true:

No matter how perfect you think your significant other is, no matter how happy you may be, and no matter how many great times you have together, it may not work out. If it doesn’t work out, that doesn’t mean your world has come to an end. It just means that God has a different plan for you, someone even more perfect for you out there waiting for you to be ready for them.

Don’t ever put up with anyone who does not treat you with respect, and never settle for anything less than ***exactly*** what you want.  –This doesn’t mean stalk a girl/guy until they give in. I am talking about settling for someone who lacks the qualities you want in a significant other.–

What makes the perfect relationship? These are a few reasons couples are together:

  • They are best friends, can tell each other everything. But that alone doesn’t make for a perfect relationship.
  • Maybe they are very attractive. Many people are. This doesn’t mean they are perfect for you. I know many attractive people with whom I would never consider a relationship. What do you do with a superficial relationship when beauty fades, as it always does?… There isn’t enough plastic surgery in the world to keep a youthful look. You get enough of that, and you’re gonna end up looking very, well, for lack of a better word, plastic. Fake. Ew. Attractive? I think not. Okay, I am done with the rant. —Have you noticed that I am very against the superficial ways of the world??
  • Maybe everyone else thinks they are great, or that they are great for you. This, too, doesn’t make for a perfect relationship. A good person doesn’t necessarily mean they are good for you.

There are several things that need to match up, or it just isn’t going to work… You need to make sure that you are happy. Going back to a blog I wrote some time ago, you need to make yourself happy without a significant other, first. If you aren’t happy with yourself and the direction you are going in life, you won’t be happy, no matter who you are dating.

  • Step 1: Decide what you want out of life, and what you want in a significant other.
  • Step 2: Find someone who wants the same things out of life, and who wants qualities you possess in their significant other.

Finding the perfect significant other is really like putting a puzzle together. If it isn’t a perfect fit, you’re going to be poking, pushing hard, ruining, the piece —other person— to make it fit, make it work. When it is the piece that fits perfectly, it’s easy to put in, and it makes the puzzle look good, “picture perfect.” Puzzles aren’t easy. Okay, 12 piece puzzles are easy. But in a world full of puzzle pieces, you may have to try to put several pieces in before you find one that fits next to you.

I guess my point to this blog is, don’t dwell too long on how much being without your significant other is hurting, and look at the positive side of the break-up. A break-up means you can continue your search for the perfect piece to the puzzle called Your Life. I can promise you, you will find the perfect piece to your puzzle. Don’t worry about timing, God knows what He’s doing.

I could go on forever about relationships. I’ve had them all, the good, the bad and the ugly. Best friend types, physical attraction types, abusive types… No person is perfect, but with the person who is perfect for you, your relationship will be perfect. –A perfect relationship isn’t all butterflies and balloons, but a perfect relationship is always growing.–

I will leave you with this: Keep searching, until you find the perfect man or woman for you. As I always said in high school (People I went to high school with can find this in their yearbooks): Have fun, be good, smile and keep your head up. Life is amazing. Don’t let it pass you by.

-Originally posted: 09-03-09

"I'm Bored"

January 30th, 2010

My dad used to say, “Don’t tell me you’re bored, I’ll give you something to do.”

I knew to shut up about being bored.

I was going through the “feed” on Facebook a few minutes ago, and saw someone’s status, “I’m bored…nothing to do…same **** every day.” There was a comment under it that said, “That’s because we live in *unnamed city*” … Now, this city isn’t a place with a population of 4. It’s actually quite large.  Sure, it’s small compared to L.A., but it’s not bad in size. I commented, “Maybe you need a hobby.”

Bored is actually a synonym for: lazy; lack of interest. Now, before you jump all over me, let me explain. There is always something to do. It’s just a matter of whether or not you have the motivation or desire to find it.

I have heard, “I’m bored at work.” If you are bored at work, it means one of two things. You are either not being challenged enough, or you need to find a job you are interested in. Or, maybe both. So many people do their job simply because at the end of the week, they have money to survive until the next time they get paid. These people are never happy, because they don’t find joy in work –which takes up a large amount of our day. Sure, every job has its frustrating points, stressful points, but that does not constitute saying you are bored. Nor would someone who enjoys their job say that when they are stressed/frustrated. Bored just isn’t a synonym for stressed and frustrated, at all.

I have also heard, “It’s my day off, and I am so bored.” Again, this just means you are too lazy to find something to do. When I have a day off, I usually have a plan. Sometimes, even a list of things that need to get done before the end of the day. The people who are “bored” on their day off, need to find a hobby. Whether it be reading, writing, playing games online, blogging –this is keeping me from being bored, at the moment–… There is always something to do.

People who say they are bored, want to be bored. There is another point that I could bring into this, but I will save it for my next blog.

Are you bored? … Get up, get some energy (real – rest; or fake – caffeine), and find something that interests you.

Have an amazing day!

-Originally posted: 11-05-09

Haiti, Personally.

January 30th, 2010

The tragedy in Haiti is so sad. I cannot imagine being hit by something so traumatic. No, I am not about to preach to you about how you should be helping. (However, if you can afford to, please do.) This is something that will hit a lot closer to home. The people of Haiti were shocked, and lost a lot of loved ones.

Do you think that the day before the buildings fell, the people of Haiti thought that within 24 hours, they would be losing so many loved ones? So many personal belongings? I doubt it. Where does this hit close to home?

Us. As Americans (and humans in general), we take advantage of the things we have, the people we have, the gift of life. The people we love and the things we have are there every day. Put yourself in the shoes of a man or woman in Haiti. Standing in the street, looking around you, seeing the buildings crumbled, children crying, people in critical condition, the dead bodies around you. Many of them being loved ones. What if it had hit in your hometown? So much heartache. I cannot imagine dealing with that much pain. Thank God I haven’t had to.

But say you could rewind the last 24 hours, and relive it all, knowing what would happen. What would you change? Would you stop to look around, appreciate the things you have? Tell your loved ones what they mean to you? Not be “bored?” Take a walk with your children? Give compliments freely? Talk out an argument? — I know I would.

I am guilty of taking these things for granted, just as everyone is. We are human. Look at the small things in your life, the water you have to drink, the clothes you have to wear, the food you have to eat. I can go on forever with the things we take for granted. My point? Be THANKFUL. I have heard so many times, “I am just waiting for the next 2 hours to pass, until I can…” –You have said it, fill it in with the “exciting” things you are blessed to have the opportunity to take part in. Enjoy every minute of life. It is a gift, that can be taken from us in an instant. Don’t waste your time doing nothing.

As I write this, I am reminded of my sister. I don’t remember exactly when it started, but one day I noticed that every time she walked out the door, as a young teen, she would yell up the stairs, “See you later, I love you!” — Not just when the weather was bad, not just after losing a loved one, not just after hearing of a tragedy, every time she walked out.

What can we learn from the tragedy in Haiti? Look around you EVERY day. Appreciate the things and people you have, EVERY day. We are not promised tomorrow. We are not promised another week, another month, another birthday. We don’t know when our loved ones may be taken from us, or when we may not be able to eat or drink. Life is an amazing gift, don’t let it pass you by.

Take care, friends.

-Originally posted: 01-20-10